[Examples] How to write and send a mourning postcard

When a close relative passes away, you should send a "mourning postcard" to inform the family that you are in mourning. We have compiled basic etiquette, from how to write a mourning postcard to how to send it.

What is a mourning postcard?

A mourning postcard is a notice to inform people that they will not be sending New Year's greetings (nengajo) because they are mourning the death of a relative. Not sending New Year's greetings due to mourning is also called "mourning absence" or "nengajo absence."

Mourning is a period of time when a close relative passes away and people refrain from attending auspicious events, generally for one year. Since New Year's cards have a strong meaning of celebrating the New Year, New Year's greetings should be sent as "Winter greetings" instead of New Year's cards.

April 2025, 1 When should you send a New Year's card? The right time and etiquette

The range of relatives who are in mourning

Generally, mourning occurs when a relative within the second degree of kinship passes away. This includes the person themselves, their spouse, siblings, siblings-in-law, children, children's spouses, grandchildren, grandchildren's spouses, parents, parents-in-law, grandparents, and grandparents-in-law.

However, if a close relative of more than three degrees kinship passes away, it is acceptable to send a mourning card.

To whom to send a mourning postcard

Mourning postcards are sent to people who exchange New Year's cards to inform them that they will refrain from sending New Year's cards (New Year's greetings). They are often not sent to relatives who are also in mourning.

In some cases, people who are work associates and do not know the deceased, or people to whom they do not want to cause unnecessary inconvenience, may choose not to send mourning postcards and instead send New Year's cards as usual. Consider the relationship between the deceased and the sender and the sender's feelings when making a decision.

When is the deadline for sending mourning postcards?

Mourning postcards should be sent so that they arrive between November and early December. If you let the recipient know that you are in mourning early, it will reduce the burden on them of preparing New Year's cards.

If you are in mourning in December or you accidentally forgot to send the card and are unable to mail it in time, send your "winter greeting card" after the end of the "Matsunouchi" period (New Year's Day to January 12th).Etiquette for sending winter greeting cardsPlease refer here for more information.

April 2025, 1 When should you send a New Year's card? The right time and etiquette

Types of postcards and stamps to use for mourning postcards

We recommend using condolence postcards sold at post offices. Condolence postcards have a moth orchid design on the stamp. If you want to use a regular official postcard or a privately made postcard (a postcard sold outside the post office or one you made yourself), be sure to affix a condolence stamp.

Please be careful not to use flashy commemorative stamps or New Year's postcards. New Year's postcards that can no longer be used due to mourning can be exchanged for condolence postcards and stamps at the post office free of charge.

How to write a mourning postcard

A mourning postcard should include the following:

Relationship notation

The relationship to the deceased is based on the sender. If the letter is sent jointly by a husband and wife, write "the relationship to the deceased from the husband's perspective."

No acronyms or clitics required

Mourning postcards should not use salutations or suffixes (Dear, Sincerely, etc.) or seasonal greetings (such as "It's getting colder in the mornings and evenings").

Do not use punctuation

It is considered good manners not to use punctuation marks on mourning postcards, which suggest a separation or end (of a relationship). Instead, leave a space or start a new line to make it easier to read.

Collection of examples of mourning postcards

We have prepared some sample sentences that can be used in mourning postcards. Please refer to them if you are unsure how to write your words of thanks or closing remarks.

"PR"